I gotta be me

I am old enough to know these words from a song that Sammy Davis Jr. sang a number of years ago. The old joke is that the only sure things are death and taxes. What has never been sure is who we are supposed to be. Most of us spend a lifetime trying to discover and then be who we are truly supposed to be.

I think the problem is that we are told who we are supposed to be so often growing up that we never really sit and consider who we “gotta be”. I know in my life, there have been too many times that I tried to be who others thought I should. This was especially negative from my childhood of never being good enough! It has followed and at times haunted me for so many years.

As a contemplative, I have learned of what Merton and others called the “false self” and “true self”. The first is who we believe we are supposed to be. Mind you, for many good Christian folks, they are trying so hard to be who they believe they are supposed to be as Christians. They are not evil, they are doing what church has told them they should be for many years. The problem is that is the “false self”. And, it is sinful. No, it is not bad or evil it is just “missing the mark”, which is what sin is.

We are called to be and embody love. To become the living “Christs” that God needs in the world, to reach the world. This is the essences of “take up your cross daily”, to put who I think I should be aside and be what I am, my “true self” in God. I am to be love in the world, Agape love, unmerited favor, to be given away to all who need love.

I get it, this is not easy and I work at being love every day. I often fail but it does not keep me from trying to be who I am called to be in God, the living Christ. That is not arrogant or trivial for me to say, it is instead incredibly humbling. I am going to make the effort to sing Sammy’s song in a different way. I need to sing each day, “I gotta be the True me”. Come on, you know you want to sing this song with me! If we are our True Selves, can you imagine what our world would become? Sing loud.

TMM

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