Abbey Heart

When you hear the word Gethsemani, most will think of Jesus in the Garden just before his crucifixion. But for me, that word takes me to the Abbey of Gethsemani in Kentucky. For me it is a place of thunderous peace. A place where time is different, where life is less complex. It is a large property, 2500 acres in the knobs of Kentucky and populated with a wonderful Abbey church, guesthouse, and so much more. It is not fancy but it most certainly is holy.

The Abbey is about 30 miles from where my mother grew up and is buried. I have known of the Abbey all of my life because they have always made wonderful cheese (no cheese these days), fruitcake, and fudge, the latter two laced with Bourbon. Wherever my family lived, my aunts would make sure we got cheese and or fudge at Christmas. My mother loved this place and, though she was Protestant, she had a deep respect for the monks and their way of life.

I go to this Abbey because I am a part of it as a Lay Cistercian of the Abbey of Gethsemane. At least once per year, I go on retreat there and when I am about an hour away my heart starts to change, to calm down, to begin to let go of all of the burdens it has been carrying. For each of us in LCG, and I think every person who goes to this place of peace, it is both deeply personal and commonly peaceful. When I drive into the parking lot, I take a breath and suddenly, my Abbey Heart opens up. I am at peace, though the world out there is still there, and for a few days, my Abbey Heart rules.

And then, I have to leave. Go back to the “real” world, to a faster pace, to more cares. That world has never gone away and I know that. My Abbey heart, you see is a choice I make, not a magical event in Kentucky. Life at the Abbey is balanced, it is about keeping that balance between work, prayer, worship, and quiet. The monks make that choice and contrary to what you might think, it is not all that easy. They really are a microcosm of the world, not a separate world. Yes, they are separated by a wall and live in that one place, all the time, but they struggle with all of the human emotions, fears, and hopes. Hmmm, just like me.

An old story about abbeys and monks goes like this. A man walks by the abbey every day and wonders what they do in there. Finally, the Abbot is at the gate and the man approaches him and asks the question, “What do you monks do in there all day?” The Abbott’s gentle and surprising reply was, “We fall down and we get up.” All sinners can be saints and all saints are sinners. That is the school of love I am a part of, where they fall down and get up. It is a place of great courage too, because you see, it is hard to fall when others know about it and harder still to put our egos away and get up.

So I think I shall work  on choosing my Abbey Heart every day, at home, at the college and at work in the garden and yard. It is a choice, that I must make in order to find the peace “that passes all understanding”. And I will keep getting up.

TMM

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