Good questions

I teach research. It is all about asking good questions, asking the right question. In the movie I Robot, Detective Spooner is trying to solve a complex mystery. The holographic program he is interacting with keeps saying it is not programmed to answer his questions. In one last attempt, he asks the holograph a question and its response is what I work on from my students every class, “now you have asked the right question” and the mystery is solved.

I wish I could tell you and my students that this is how it works in the research world, but often we just end up with more questions. Oh, wait, isn’t that just like life? I think spiritual life is about asking the right questions and not at all about any of the answers. Like prayer. We have this notion that prayer is about asking God for or about things. It is not about the answers we think God is giving us but about the questions we are asking of God.

Let’s face it, there are only four answers God can give: yes, no, maybe, and not now. Oh wait, those are the same four I had to offer to my daughter as she was growing up. Sadly, we are all about the answer with God, rarely about the question, which is the very act of having a conversation with the Eternal Creator of the Universe.

Now that should cause you and I to pause: The Creator of All wants to hear from us? We matter that much? Then maybe the answer has already been given and we need to learn to focus on the questions. When asked about where he lived, Jesus simply said come and see. No answer, just an offer. When we ask God, we are not given an answer but asked to come and see. That is an offer to view the question from God’s perspective instead of our own. Only then do we know how to ask the right questions.

The honest truth is that when we get to the point where we see from God’s perspective, the answer no longer matters. Instead, we learn to “come and see”. We learn that an answer is no longer needed. We learn to ask better questions of God, then we learn that we already knew the answer. My mother died almost 15 years ago. It was difficult and my first question, quite naturally, was why? I learned that this question is not a good one. Oh, not because of the lack of any good answer but because it is not the right question. When we ask that our of our pain, hurt, anger, and deep sense of loss, we are really asking a very selfish (and very normal) question: “why is this happening to me?”

The right question is not why but “what now”? That is a question that we should ask every time we chat with the Eternal. Not why, but what now Eternal One? That becomes an offer to be part of the answer. With this one question, we become partners in life with the Eternal. Now that’s the right question!

TMM

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