Month: November 2018

At an early age, we begin to ask the question “who am I”? It is important that we ask this question. At first, we must ask it of (or learn it from) our parents and family. As we grow up, we begin to see if what our parents told us about who we are is true. And, when it is, we begin to live by that definition of who we are or better said, we live into that definition of ourselves. And, when it is not true, we have to find a better way to define ourselves.

In the Reformed churches and the Catholic churches, infants are baptized in order to show the world that this child already belongs to the Divine and to show the parents, the church and the world the commitment that is expected from them to help this child define who they are. Later, when they are old enough to understand, their baptism is confirmed in the church. Again, done correctly, this is a wonderful and powerful process of learning who we are in Christ.

But, it often does not go so smoothly. Our parents might not have defined us very well. Often parents define a child through the eyes of who the parent wanted/wants to be and not as the child is and can be. This leaves a child with confusion. Am I who my parents have told me I am? Or, am I something different? I am one of those kids. Some 60+ years later, I still wrestle with whether I am good enough or not. My parents both explicitly and implicitly defined me as not good enough or needing to be a little better than I was.

You are who you choose to be. You get to ultimately define yourself. The truth is, the Church has not done a good job in teaching you or me how to define ourselves. The “false self” is who we think we should be or want ourselves to be. That is ego. The “true self” is who we are in God. The Eternal already lives in us and like a sculpture, our life is about chiseling away the unnecessary parts to reveal the “true self” as it resides in the Eternal. As it has from our moment of birth.

Who am I? I am the precious child of the Creator of all things. I will let the Creator define me with the words of praise from the Creator: It is good!

 

TMM

Thanksgiving Day is a holiday filled with family, friends, food, naps, and sometimes a homecoming or two. Isn’t it sad that we have to establish a national holiday to remind people to give thanks for things? Modern society does not really seem to care about giving thanks very much these days. The holiday has all of the food and family that it has always had, but the really important events of this holiday season now seem to happen on Friday.

Black Friday is called that because it is traditionally the first shopping day of the Christmas season and it puts retailers “in the black” on their accounts. This is the day of giving thanks for retailers and merchants. And they are giving thanks, usually, at our expense. And the expense is often pretty high. So these days, stores are open on Thanksgiving afternoons or midnight Friday and people line up to buy the one toy that their kids absolutely have to have for Christmas.

What have we become? We are not giving thanks, we are giving in to our wants and desires. Please do not misunderstand, I do not begrudge stores and businesses from making a living. I do fault our greedy and materialistic society for corrupting a very important holiday that is supposed to be about family and giving thanks for all that we have. We seem to have lost our way.

Thanksgiving is intended for so much more. It is in the fall because it represents the feast of a bountiful year. What is more, it is a time of giving thanks for the Advent season that usually begins the Sunday of the Thanksgiving weekend or the following Sunday. This is a meaning that is rarely if ever taught or even considered. We are to be giving thanks for what we have had during the full year that is coming to an end and to give thanks for the Advent of the coming of the Christ child.

As we move toward the darkest days of the year, we are hopeful and expectant. That one spark of light in the darkness is the same spark of light that is within all living things. It is the Eternal light that never goes out, is never quenched. This holiday, give thanks for of the things that have happened in the past year and that the Eternal light will grow brighter and brighter each day, to overcome the darkness of the season and the darkness that can grow so quickly in our own hearts.

 

TMM

I love this time of the year. I am such a kid and I don’t care whether folks know it or not. It is the one reason I desire great wealth…..to give it away freely. I would love to walk into a store, see a person loaded down with gifts for their kids and just pay for all of it. As crazy as it sounds, I have dreamed of being able to do that all of my life, even when I actually was a kid. I am not sure why.

Advent is the time we realize that as the world grows darker each day, a tiny spark of light remains. As we pass the four Sundays of Advent, the light grows brighter until it is “born” on Christmas day. Do I know that Jesus was not born on December 25th? Of course, I do, but to get hung up on the date of birth is to miss the point of the entire life of Christ. Advent is celebrated at this time of the year because it coincides with what is happening in Nature itself. The harvest has come, the flowers are spent, it is getting colder, and darker. That is why we celebrate Thanksgiving just before it, to go toward Advent with a full heart after a long year of work.

Advent is (or at least should be) celebrated as the Christian New Year by all of us who are followers. We should see the gifts we give as the celebration of a successful year that has preceded and the hope for a new year on the horizon. We should freely give because it is the right thing to do. But, we need to be giving things that count eternally. It is not about the money spent or the expense of the gifts. It is about having an attitude that celebrates the abundance of our lives and the desire to give that away to others.

Those gifts? How about hospitality? How about genuine concern? How about a kind word? Most of all how about opening our eyes and seeing all that there is in the world, and then embracing it with unmerited love? Maybe that is what “raised to walk in newness of life” really means.

TMM

Across my life, I have heard the phrase, “open your eyes!” lots of times. Usually, it is an agitated expression intended to show me that I am being blind to something someone else thinks is important. Other times, though, it is the prelude to a pleasant surprise as in a birthday gift for which I am told to close my eyes at first, until the proper preparations are made and then told to, “open your eyes”.

Opening our eyes is a choice we make. Sometimes we choose not to open our eyes. We are afraid of our uncomfortable with what we might see when we do. Remember all those scary movie scenes where you just close your eyes until they are over? That is clearly a choice. But don’t we do the same thing in life? If we are honest the answer is yes we (I) do. It is called “turning a blind eye” to something that is important.

Throughout the New Testament, well the Old Testament too, we are told to open our eyes. To see all that is around us. In some of these examples, we are really being told to open our hearts. “Give us this day our daily bread” is supposed to be an eye opener I think. I add to the prayer, ” and help me to remember all of those who have no bread”.  As in, please help me keep my eyes open to the need in the world.

During these times, when hatred has become acceptable, we need to open our eyes and see. The caveat here is, whose eyes do we see with? The call for all Christians is to see with the eyes of Christ. To see this life with the eyes of the Living God. Leaders who foster anger, fear, and hatred are not the problem, they are the symptom. And we find these leaders in the church as well as in government. No, these people are not the problem, they are only exploiting that which we turn a blind eye toward in ourselves.

And, that my dear ones, is the real issue for each of us. We can, as Jesus said, “see the speck in the other person’s eye while ignoring the board in our own.” To turn that seeing eye inward is hard to do. It means we have to die to ourselves and see ourselves as God does, all the good and the bad. We have to admit that we allow these problems in our world to happen because we just refuse to see them.

I can speak for me, I work daily to see as much as I can, even the painful things about myself. Trust me, there are lots of those, just ask those closest to me. And therein lies the answer, the One closest to me loves all that I am and sees me completely. Open your eyes to as much as you can. Life becomes fuller when you do.

TMM

Grief is something we all have or will feel at some point in our lives. It might be over the death of a loved one, of a beloved pet, or maybe that test you didn’t study for and made an F. Whatever the issue, grief will come to you and me. And when it does, how we deal with it is all important. If we ignore it, battle through it, or act as if it will just go away, it will make us sick, always spiritually and quite often physically.

The hardest part of grief, it seems to me, is the anger. My mother, father, and brother all died within a 14 month period, so I truly do understand grief. I also understand the anger. In a sermon I read recently, the point of the sermon was that we can rant and rave at God all we want and that it is okay. The scripture was about Lazarus. That story is interesting for what is not said, that Mary and Martha were hurt and angry at Jesus. They told him if he had been there none of this would have happened.

When you are in the heart of the storm of grief and loss, if you are like me the first thought is “God if you were really here none of this would have happened”! And we are angry. But who are we really angry at? Most therapeutic discussions talk about being angry at the one who died, for dying. And that is most certainly the case much of the time. But, I will give you another point to consider. We are equally angry at the dead, God…..and ourselves.

How can I say that? Think of this, we often grieve over silly things like our wrecked new car, a lost job, a lost love, and so much more. It is not that those things don’t matter it is just that grieving over things means we had an attachment to them that may not have been so healthy. We are mad at ourselves for losing. So trust me, when my family all died in a 14 month period, I felt cheated, robbed and, well, angry. I found that inside myself, all of the hurt and anger of a lifetime came boiling up. Most of all because I had believed for so long that I was never good enough, that I could have done more to relay my love or understanding or caring but never did.

There is good news, God lets us get really angry. God lets us cry out in anger and hurt to God. In the eye of the storm, that “still, small voice” still speaks to us. It says, “I know it hurts my child. I will always be in these moments with you. You are not responsible or to blame. You are not alone. You have always been good enough for me. Always.

TMM

In Texas, as in many places around the world, Dia de la Muertos, the Day of the Dead, is a celebration of the dead. But, it is not morbid or negative and it fits the season. All Hallow’s Eve and All Saints Day precede it and are important to those whose cultures celebrate it.

This particular celebration is an honoring of all those who have gone before us, a celebration of our ancestors. The skeletons and laughing skulls are not so morbid reminders of those we have loved and who have loved us. It is also clear that it has the same purpose as All Saints Day, during which we remember those who have gone before us all in the Christian heritage. It should be a joyous remembrance of lives well lived and of lives still being lived. It is a celebration of life.

Now that sounds strange, doesn’t it? The Day of the Dead is a celebration of life. But that is the truth. It is about life lived and being lived. As Christians, we should celebrate the lives, besides the saints, who have given birth to ourselves, who have set the finish line for what a good life can be. The ultimate Patron Saint of this day is Christ. In his crucifixion, we celebrate and honor a life lived to perfection.

Christians do not call this celebration Dia de Los Muertos. We call it the Eucharist. It should not surprise you to read this. Remember these words, “As often as you do this, do it in remembrance of me.” We look at the cross, at the crucifix, and we remember and celebrate a great life lived perfectly. It should not sadden or discourage us but instead, give us hope. It should give us the joy to know we were included in that life and perhaps most importantly, it should give us a sense of purpose. For you see, we are now to be that very life. That life that represents all that is good in this world.

TMM