Seeing the path

At my college, I wrote and received a grant for “vocational discernment”. That was a tradition, in the  past, where people tried to decide if they were called to religious life, i.e. monk, priest, nun, etc. The Protestant reformation, with it’s notion of the priesthood of the believer, altered the view of discernment to say that we are all called to something. So, I have peer mentors who are working with new students to help them discern. Well, we don’t say it quite that way, what we do say is “what are you going to  be when you grow up?” And then, we add to the process by asking, “what makes your heart happy when you do it?”

A dear friend spoke at my college recently about this very subject and without us speaking about it, she used those very words “do what makes your heart happy and get paid for it”. She and I have been friends for 30 years, when she was training for the Olympic trials in cycling. Her life story is one of ongoing discernment, to find what makes her heart happy. And for her it was and is teaching. It was not her first choice but it is where the path led.

I am right there with my friend Julie Ann. I am a teacher, but I have not always been a teacher. I have practiced social work for 40 years and have had the most varied and glorious experiences. I am very fortunate. But, about those same thirty years ago, field placement students started telling me that I was making good sense to them and that I should teach social work. That changed my path and put me on a very different road to higher education.

As Julie Ann told our students, there is a best path. It does not mean that any path that leads us to love God, neighbor, and self is a bad path, for that is what we are all called to. No, my friend was making the point that if we will set aside what we want, what we think we should do or should be and see where we are being led, we will find that thing that makes our hearts happy. She also made a powerful point we all need to hear…..even when we are on that perfect, best path, totally where God wants us to be, there is no guarantee that bad things won’t happen, that there won’t be storms to weather. The promise is we don’t have to walk the path alone.

For me, that is totally true. I started to teach at a university and crossed paths with a rather vindictive department chair who decided I was not what they wanted in the department (in spite of being voted Teacher of the Year my last year in the department). I just knew I would never teach again and for 12 years, I didn’t teach. Then, the path turned and I came full circle to the place I know I am called to every day, my little historically Black college. This makes my heart happy and I get paid for it.

So, can you see your path? Looking back is the only way to see the winding path and understand all of the events that got you where you are but you cannot always be looking back. The African word “sankofa” carries the meaning I want you to hear, the notion that looking back is a good way to remember our roots and to recall our history. All of those twists and turns tell us something about God’s involvement in our lives. The path ahead is not for us to know. As my brother reminds me from time to time, whatever path you find yourself on, light your candle and follow it.

So, are you on the path to your first, best destiny? Is your heart happy? Can you see those things that led you to where you are now and the hand of God not directing you but supporting you as you discern? That is what it means to be a contemplative.

TMM

The Way Home

About a year ago, I literally found my way home. Now, hold on, that doesn’t mean I was gone for a long time. In this case, I am referring to my childhood home in San Antonio, Texas. That is where I grew up and about a year ago, taking my wife to San Antonio was sort of a pilgrimage to show her the city from my own point of view. We drove by the house and my wife said, “you should stop and talk to those people and take your picture”. Now that is a great wife, to help you do things you probably wouldn’t do yourself but need to.

I had my picture taken on the very front porch where I had my picture taken many times, starting with the one 55 years before. I met the family who lives there and learned that the wife’s parents were the ones who bought the house from my mother 46 years before. So, it turns out you can go home again. The path that led me back home after all of those years is a winding, turning path that is still going forward.

So how do we get home? Well, I think we need a partner in the process. If my wife had not encouraged me to stop, I wouldn’t have and I would have missed out on a wonderful experience, one of completion, of coming full circle. But, before we take a step on the path, we have to ask “what is home?” For Christians, home is not heaven. Does that surprise you? Perhaps it shouldn’t because Jesus lived so we could learn how to live, not wait patiently to die.

I think the saying “home is where the heart is” applies more than we might know. If my heart is not healthy (spiritually I mean) then we wander and search and look for home. We are called to relationship with God. Personal, private, life-giving and abundant. If my heart is (as the old Baptist preacher might say) “right with God” then I am home. And isn’t that all any of us really want? To be home? To be at home with God?

Now, as to how we get home. Thomas Merton, the monk and spiritual writer once noted that we search everywhere only to discover what we were looking for has been right there inside of us all the time. That is what it means to be a mystic and a seeker, to find that place of deep relationship with God, the Creator of All. And, that is where home is……right there inside of me where God has resided since the moment of my birth!

I noted above that my wife helped me find my way home in San Antonio. That is also true for all of us spiritually. We all need a friend to help us find the way, whether a spiritual friend, spiritual director or a faith community. That friend, that help is what helps us find our way home, that friend or faith community is what says to us….You should stop, you are home.

 

TMM