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Are you in a hurry? I know that over the past several years, I have been caught up in hurry, what biofeedback and meditation folks might call hurry sickness. It comes from the society we live in, one that demands we “measure up” and be “successful”. As a university professor, it is so very easy to get caught up in this world. You know the one. It demands a better answer each day, more progress and achievement each day, more, and more, and more. This is our society, one that never slows down and looks down upon us if we do.

When it is time to retire don’t we say that person is being “put out to pasture?” How in the world is that a compliment? Or the recognition of all that a person might have done? Our society looks at the older, “seasoned” citizens as a problem to be dealt with and tolerated. That is most certainly not the way of Christ and should not be our mindset in any part of life.

It is hard to escape this problem. It is hard to see ourselves as good enough just the way we are and accept it. This is what I believe Christ meant when he said, ” to follow me you must take up your cross daily and follow”. For so many years I thought of this as such a sacrifice and that it is a commandment. It is neither. It is how we should be as Followers of Christ. We get to make the decision daily whether we want to keep on doing things our way or to let that go and do things God’s way.

Gee, that sounds so simple. Trust me after more than 50 years as a follower, it is anything but easy. When I first started on this path with Christ, it was all about the rules, the have-tos, the musts. Why do we do that to ourselves and to our fellow Christ followers? Christ never did that, he never said “come to me when you get your act together” and then we will talk. Why do we not teach people in the Christian community that it is a daily choice? Perhaps it is even a moment-by-moment choice, to do things God’s way or to strike out on our own.

This is what it means to “take up your cross daily”. Each day, it is a choice and if you are like me, it is a hard choice. No, not because it is so hard to follow Christ. It is hard because the world we live in calls so strongly to do it the world’s way, to do things our own way. Perhaps we should stop trying so hard to “be like Christ” and just learn to be ourselves! We are, after all, created in His image.

TMM

It is always interesting to have someone tell you to “just be yourself”. How can you not be? I mean, think about it, who else would you be. The Irish writer, Oscar Wilde said, “Be yourself, all of the others are taken”. Now, before you move on, think about what Wilde is saying. If you are like me, you spend a great deal of time in this world being someone else. In our society, when people ask us who we are, we very quickly respond with our label, what we do.

If we are not careful, this is how we see ourselves spiritually. There is no small number of churches and denominations that teach people that they are not good enough and never will be. Growing up, it was very common to hear: “you need to get right with God”. And in the context of the early religious teachings I had, it seemed to be important. That was the basic point of most of the revivals I ever went to. In fact, that version of evangelism is based on telling people what is wrong with them and how they must get “saved” to have any hope at all. The trouble is that they tell you what you are saved from but rarely tell you what you are saved to.

So, what are we saved to? What does saved even mean? The implied meaning is that we are being saved from ending up in Hell. But, is that really what we are being saved from? Why doesn’t the church teach what we are “saved” to (or for)? Is it possible that salvation is that moment when we realize that the Living God has been right there, inside of us, all of our lives? Perhaps we are being saved from ourselves?

For years, I was taught that every person has a “sin nature”. That we are sinners from birth, in need of salvation. What if that sinful nature is our own ego? Now, if that is what is really going on, then “take up your cross daily” means something important. It means that every day, we get to make a choice to do things our way or to do things God’s way. Suddenly, the “age of accountability” means something. We become accountable when we become aware that there is another way to be.

If you were to believe that you are “being saved” from yourself in order to follow a “more excellent way” then many things start to make sense. Isn’t this what Jesus did every time he healed someone? The woman “taken in adultery” was simply asked, where are those who condemn you? And the response came, “neither do I condemn you”. Maybe, just maybe, Jesus was the one Person that learned early that his ego was the great deceiver. Consider the temptation, at each point, Satan, offered Jesus the chance to do things “his way” rather than God’s. And it would make even more sense if we saw Satan as ego. The moment we do that, we understand all that Jesus gave up by being a human being on this earth.

And, once we give self up, we understand the more excellent way.

TMM

I have avoided writing about this. It has interfered with everyday life for almost two years. People are asking as I do, when will we get back to normal? Maybe that is the problem. Maybe we deceive ourselves by seeking something called “normal”? My aunt has a sign in her kitchen that says, “as far as anyone knows, our family is normal”. I have the same sign in my kitchen.

That little sign is a reminder. It reminds me that being normal is an illusion. No one is normal, they simply are who they are. It is like being “average”. That is a representative statistic and as a way of being it does not exist. So maybe we should stop saying “let’s just get back to normal”. Maybe if we just let go of normal and average we could be real people, we could love ourselves as is, we could love others as they are.

When this whole pandemic thing started, I said that society would change and the church would change. First of all, we would stop taking things for granted that they will be the same each day. People began to take civil rights more seriously, that is a plus. Churches had to examine why they exist and how to meet the needs of people who need emotional and spiritual support. I still believe that the emergent church can use this time to become more personal and real. Congregations of 10,000 people are no longer viable. Maybe they never were. And maybe, the needs of others are more obvious to us now. Maybe people cannot control being poor, unemployed, homeless, or sick.

Jesus had it right. We need to live in the moment, to see all that God is doing in that moment, and take a bit more time to savor life. Most of all to be ourselves, whoever that is on any given day. As Oscar Wilde said, “Be yourself, all of the others are taken”.

TMM

Our society today is full of hurry. We even have a name for it, hurry sickness. This is the world of next achievements and your value comes from what you have accomplished. It will wear out your very soul because it is the opposite of the “narrow path” of the Christian life.

Working in a university environment is a prime place to get this sickness. Each day, it seems, is a demand to do more, write more, publish more and it lives as a usually unspoken expectation. It is even worse if you are an administrator. I know, I have been there. And, if you are like me, it comes home with you and you hurry through most things.

I do not believe Jesus ever hurried over anything. Someone comes to ask for help and he waits a couple of days before showing up. Was he being cruel? Was he testing the person’s faith and commitment? I don’t think He ever did that. What I do think is that Jesus knew that hurry never makes things better and that living in the moment is much more important and much more faithful and much less stressful.

Can you imagine what would have happened if Jesus kept hurrying through a sermon on the mount or through healing or toward Jerusalem? Jesus knew that everything has a way of happening in God’s good time. A time much broader than our perspective can embrace. When we hurry, we are doing things to get them done, not because it is God’s way. When we hurry, we also miss details that might just matter. I am glad God does not hurry and is always patient with me because the alternative leaves me all alone and on my own.

So what about you? Are you hurrying? And if you are, why is that? For me, it is a time to let go of hurry and achievement. I am who I am and have no need to prove my worth. I think that is the hard part of being on the Christian path, to trust that you are loved and capable and valuable just the way you are. It means you have to disengage from society’s way to value people. It is not about what you do it is about who you are.

TMM

On a spiritual director’s training retreat, this poem pretty much wrote itself in the Piney Woods of East Texas:

True worship

The birds are in full voice.

They are the true preachers of God’s glory.

Their call and response was the first.

With chits, chirps, whistles and screeches, the Melody of the Sacred is summed up in one place!

In this moment the Sacred, the Hagia Sophia lives.

In this moment, I am called yet again to come alive and let my life join this choir in worship.

TMM

In Psalm 99 it says that God is equitable. It is an interesting word because it is not the same as equality. Equity is Biblical, it is Christ living among us. It is found in Acts where it talks about each receiving according to their need or according to their ability. We are very quick to talk about all being “equal under the Cross” but that is just not correct.

If you understand the difference between equality and equity then so much more of what Jesus said makes good sense. In every encounter, he gave the person what they needed, he did not give them all of the same things. This seems to have been the problem with the Jewish leadership of His time. They were adamant that everyone was equal. Sadly, those sorts of ideas have a modern ring. “All animals are equal, but some are more equal than others” is a quote from Orwell’s book Animal Farm. Jesus was adamant that equality was not enough. He gave every person what they needed and some were equal, some not. Remember, “to those who have been given much, much is expected” (Luke 12:48). That is equity.

Perhaps the problem for us is that we have allowed equality to become our liturgy when what was demanded is equity. What would the Church (Universal) look like if we did it Jesus’ way and every person got what they needed? Think of that, those who have a great deal are responsible for sharing with those who don’t have anything. Does that sound like socialism to the American ear? Perhaps. Is it a statement of equity? Absolutely.

The life Jesus lived among us was all about equity. Each person received (and receives today) what they need. Notice this, not what they want, what they need. Perhaps that is the true point of most of our prayers….to find the equitable way. To pray that each person receives the grace they need to make it through the day, through life. Is this not a better way to go about life? Is it more difficult? It is better and it is much more difficult because we have to discern what people need, each one, and not just what we think they should have.

Any parent of more than one child knows that you love each of your kids, but it is not the same is it? Each child is loved but in an individual way, in a way that is personalized to what that child needs. Isn’t that God’s grace in action? It is personal, it is not equal, it is equitable.

TMM

I have heard, all of my life in church things like many are called but few are chosen and you must only enter through the narrow gate, which was explained as a metaphor for Christ. If that sounds like a very exclusive club, I agree. It seems to eliminate everyone who is not Christian doesn’t it? Or, does it?

Living in God, living God’s way is not an exclusive club. You do not have to be a Christian to live God’s way. People from all over the world live lives of kindness and caring and giving. So what is this “narrow gate” all about? It is my understanding that the “narrow gate” was used by shepherds to ensure that each sheep could be counted. The sheep could only go through the gate one at a time. It was done to count each sheep individually. It was done so that the shepherd could know each and every sheep. It was done so that the sheep could not get through except alone.

It dawned on me that the “narrow gate” is not about excluding anyone. It is instead about having to go through the “gate” alone, one by one. We cannot find someone to walk with us through the gate, nor can we have someone go there for us, instead we have to get through by ourselves. The second thing that dawned on me is that entering through that gate alone means the Christ, the Living God sees everyone individually, gets to know and understand us individually.

Perhaps we have missed the point. That narrow gate is the way in which the God of All of life knows us personally. That “one-at-a-time” approach is what makes the God of all a personal God. Throughout time, people have had to have a god. The God that is the one Christ talked about as being above all others is unique. This Creator wants a personal relationship with each one of us. Now, does the “narrow gate” make sense? That gate is how we are one on one with God, how God “lays eyes on us” directly. No other deity that I have encountered in study or travel takes a personal and individual interest in the created.

So, this metaphor is much more about one-on-one love with the Creator of all than it is about excluding anyone. Perhaps that is why the metaphor is taught in other ways, it is very personal to be one – on- one with the Living God. That is very intimate and most of us feel unworthy of that deep intimacy. We are NOT unworthy. That one life sacrificed made all of creation worthy. It makes all of creation able to be aware of the intimacy the Living God wants to share with us.

TMM

As a youth, many years ago, my church did a musical called “Celebrate Life”. It was fun and meaningful. It was my coming into my true extrovert self, so of course I loved to perform. It was an important lesson that went right past all of us. You see as young Southern Baptists, we had been taught that salvation was mostly about getting to go to Heaven. How did we get this so wrong?

The very title of the musical should have gotten our attention. It was not called Celebrate Heaven or the Afterlife. Jesus said, “I have come that you might have life and that life in abundance.” He did not say, “I came to get you into heaven”. In the Gospels, it is always clear that Jesus was (and is) about life, not heaven and not death. It was always the plan, to learn to live a life with Christ as the example.

He taught us that his life was the key to the Kingdom. Somewhere along the way, the Church got focused on blood and not life. Focused on afterlife instead of doing the real work of the kingdom and living life as Jesus did. It is sad to think that we are often taught that all we have to look forward to is heaven and not how to live like we are already in heaven.

I have learned (am learning) that the importance of life in God is in the doing, not in waiting. How many times have I missed the moment because I was focused on the end of the journey. And by the way, Jesus also said that the end of the journey is the beginning of a new journey. We all arrive at a point (or an age) when we begin to wonder about what happens after. Jesus taught that there is not point in worrying about that, instead we should feel assured about that and focus on each day we have.

Here is a truth that we must all face: no one gets out of this world alive! What comes after is assured, we will be at peace, we will return to the Sacred, at peace. When that time comes for me, I want to be comforted by knowing I tried to do it right, tried to live the life I was called to, that we are all called to, with grace, humility, and joy. My prayer, as I get older, is that I can bring some of that peace to others, to help them get on the “narrow path” a little earlier and ultimately, before I am done, to teach as many as I can how to celebrate this life.

TMM

It is not unusual to wonder what the Bible means when it says that Adam and Eve were not to eat from the tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil. If you take it on the literal level, you are faced with the notion that all of God’s creation must never understand good and evil. That quickly devolves into just follow the rules and you will be safe and, if we are honest about how this story is interpreted, you will be loved by God.

This notion, based on following the rules and not on love, has led to a path that says sin came to the world because a woman could not resist temptation and a man couldn’t resist doing what his wife said. Really? So, as it happens often, we blame women and then we tell them that they will have “pain in birth” because of it. You see, this is exactly why God told them not to eat from that tree, because without maturity and love, it simply becomes a blaming process.

Is it possible that God didn’t want them to eat from that tree before they were mature enough to understand that God’s lover is the way to interpret good and evil? I believe that is exactly the point of the story, that before we begin to judge and develop the idea of “sin” we must be mature enough to trust God. If we learn of “good and evil” from the place of love, then we understand the life of Christ and the law of love.

How is it that church teaches us to obey and that because we don’t obey, we are sinful and must pay for those sins? And, then we are taught that because we are simply human, we cannot always obey so our humanity is what put Jesus on the Cross. Perhaps, with maturity, we are able to see that this is not the case. Jesus died to teach us that our lives matter but that even when they matter, it might go horribly wrong.

I am in agreement with Richard Rohr, Jesus was not plan B. Jesus was plan A always! He came to show us how to live, how it is possible to live life a different way, the way of Love. “I have come that you might have life and that life in abundance”. That life that he showed us, that is the “blueprint” for what we should do. We love, we accept, we forgive, and we go the extra mile. It is because he lived that we are saved, not because he died.

TMM

I have been in the Christian life for 50 years now. I have read the following scripture I don’t know how many times:

For through the law, I died to the law, so that I might live to God. I have been crucified with Christ; ²⁰and it is no longer I who live, but it is Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. ²¹I do not nullify the grace of God; for if justification comes through the law, then Christ died for nothing. (Galatians 2:19 – 21)

I finally understand it, it is the description of being contemplative, of moving toward a deeper life. These scriptures are clear, it is not about the rules, the Law, or the orders of the Church. It is, instead, about the Life of Christ. It is the idea of “living into” that life. This is what “take up your cross daily” refers to. Each day, by choosing to do things God’s way, we live into the life of Christ. We accept more of that precious gift we have been given.

Don’t misunderstand, this is not easy. Intellectually, it readily makes sense but in living it out, if you are like me, it is hard to get past what society tells me, what Church tells me, and worst of all what I tell myself. Paul is clear, the old ways he followed (The Law) just don’t work.

It has taken me over 30 years as a contemplative to discover what these verses really mean. I wonder why the Church never explained this? I get it, control matters to any organization but so many are left to believe that they have to follow the rules, acquire the beliefs, and do what they are told. Christ is our example of what the Christian life is to look like, live in love with all and do as much good as you can as long as you can.

My concern is that the Church is too busy explaining the rules, the theology, and the behaviors required but never offer these simple thoughts of Paul as the life we are called to. Fr. Richard Rohr talks about the two halves of life, Paul is referring to the second half, where we truly become free. All of the “have-tos” of the world are replaced by the “want tos” that are the true essence of living the Christian life. To feel that one must follow what they are told is not empowering, the fancy name is social control. To be honest, Church is, most often, an instrument of social control.

To be empowered is to make choices because they are good choices, not because we have to do something. When “have to” enters in, empowerment leaves quickly. So, Christ came to empower us, let us do as Paul has said, “to live is Christ”.

TMM